I was so excited to speak with the incredible Amy Halvorsen about her journey to motherhood of two young girls in her late 30s. Amy is a marketing powerhouse, an infectious personality, and a dear friend.
I’ll start with what Amy had to say, and next week, I’ll write my own reflections on our interview.
Q. Were you ever uncertain about wanting to be a parent? Before deciding, what were your biggest fears?
I was uncertain for a really long time. I am a natural worrier and over-thinker, and this decision was no exception. I was afraid of losing the freedom to do whatever I wanted. Also, I’m sensitive to noise, and I worried about how I would cope with all the noise babies bring. I even sometimes doubted my own capability at parenting. But I had a sense at some level—a sense hard to describe or name—that I would have children one day.
Q. Before deciding, what attracted you to the idea of having children?
I was most drawn to having kids from watching friends with kids. I saw one friend in particular become a better person—and a better friend—after having kids. She became less selfish and more present. That really struck me.
Q. What are the messages you got from society about making the decision?
“It’s a no brainer.” “How could you think twice about it?”
Q. Who in your life most influenced your thinking about parenthood?
My mom had the biggest influence. I love my mom so much I decided to live across the street from her. But her expectations for perfection when I was young might also have been the source of some of my self-doubt about becoming a parent. It’s impossible to be a perfect parent, so why would I even try?
Q. How did you decide to become a parent?
After getting married, we waited about a year and a half before trying to have a baby. At that point, I’d become bored of my own self! I had lived my life, followed the travel bug, and spent time getting to know myself as an adult. I had also spent a year and a half cementing my marriage. I’d also seen enough friends have babies that I realized I was capable of doing it. It seemed less daunting now that I had examples. Ultimately, I decided I would regret it if I didn’t have kids of my own.